This hashtag is trending on Twitter. It’s a lot of fun. There are a few things my 6 year old self needs to know…
Dear 6 year old self,
* I’m sorry but you are not going to be She-Ra when you grow up. Or a Wuzzle. Or a Care Bear. Not even a Mighty Morphin Power Ranger…
* You will grow into your enormous teeth and no one will call you Bugs anymore, I promise
* Boys will want to kiss you and that’s OK. They won’t always smell like pee
* When you throw those photos away of picking your nose, take them down the street and throw them in that bin. Otherwise that photo is still in circulation 24 years later
* Pay attention in those French lessons in a few years, instead of taking off your glasses to look cool and not being able to see a bloody word on the board. In 24 years time you will then not still be trying to learn French
* And about those glasses – one day you will actually let someone slice open your eyeball and shine a laser in there. From that day no more glasses. Wait, don’t cry…it’s worth it!
* When you are older you will actually like baked beans and egg mayo. For real. I know you think I am lying but it’s true!
* Those Spliffy jackets are actually hideous and you will one day be glad that you weren’t allowed one
* You won’t always be so shy. You will annoy some people at how confident you come across as. Only we know it’s all an act though right?
* Reading so much is actually kind of cool when you are older, and not just for nerds. We are talking about 15 years though so hang in there
* The bullies will make you a strong, kick ass woman who will achieve great things. They, on the other hand, start getting pregnant at 14
* You will live to at least 29 without drowning or being set on fire. Chill
* You won’t turn into a Green Giant if you eat that sweetcorn
* One day you will be allowed to wear all the make up you want, but try not to go overboard and look like a clown
* People can tell when you shave your upper lip. That is all
* That screaming ball of pink actually turns out to be a pretty cool sister one day. Just use cotton wool in your ears for now
* Enid Blyton lies. None of it is real. Although you will never stop wishing that it is
* The fringe (bangs) just start getting thicker and thicker if you don’t get mum to stop cutting. Refuse the scissors and grow that shizz out immediately
* In the future there is this thing called laser hair removal. It IS worth the money
* One day your eyes won’t look Chinese anymore and will just look normal
* When you are grown up you will hate snow
* You will always sleep with your mouth wide open. Just get over the embarrassment now and save yourself a lifetime of torture
* Never think “this is it”. There is always something awesome around the corner
* When you are grown up you really can go to bed at whatever time you like, eat chocolate for breakfast and buy all the things that you are not allowed now. It’s kinda sweet!
* Stop worrying so much – you are only 6!!! Now get outside and play!!!
What would you say to your 6 year old self?